By Naomi Yaw
Buffalo, NY – My husband and I have a Sunday morning ritual. We roll out of bed and drive to a local diner for a hearty breakfast and a heavy dose of catch-up conversation. We seem to have our best talks over bacon and eggs. As we sip our coffee, we discuss the topics we didn't have a chance to cover during our hectic workweek. Our conversation ranges from what happened on "The Apprentice," to current news events.
This week, the Terri Schiavo case weighed heavily on my mind. I was disturbed by the Schiavo family struggle playing out in a very obscene public forum, wondering how it could have gotten so out of control. Watching this drama unfold on television left me with an anxious feeling as I internalized and personalized the unfortunate chain of events.
Obviously I am not alone in personalizing the situation, seeing as how Congress got involved and ordinary citizens have gathered outside the hospice to picket for their cause. I can't help but relate to this ordinary family and wonder how my family would deal if we were in this situation.
"We haven't talked about Terri Schiavo," my husband began. He beat me to it. Apparently her case was weighing on his mind as well. After discussing the media coverage, I shared my point of view regarding Terri Schiavo.
I am bearing witness to a situation that could easily be unfolding in my own family circle. I would be remiss if I didn't take the opportunity to learn something from this regrettable set of circumstances. Here's what I believe:
Tragedy can strike anyone at any time, no matter how rich or poor, young or old.
For better or for worse is a serious commitment. I must remember and honor the commitments I have made to others.
I am my best advocate. I have an obligation to my loved ones to express my wishes so they aren't left with the burden of making impossible decisions.
Life is beyond the air in my lungs and nutrients in my veins. By interacting with the world around me, I know I am alive.
Humanity should stand above politics and religion. I support decisions made in the best interest of humanity, not decisions based along party lines or theology.
Without loss, I wouldn't realize how lucky I really am.
With the passing of Terri Schiavo, the time has come to reflect on the lessons her family has taught us. I feel the need to make my own desires undeniably clear. I explained to my husband that I had printed out a blank Health Care Proxy and Living Will. I intend to fill-out my copy with him, detailing my wishes regarding life sustaining medical procedures in the event that I become incapacitated. After I have outlined my health care preferences, I intend to inform my parents and brother of my wishes.
I am doing this not only for myself, but for my loved ones as well. I don't want my family to spend years feuding with each other, dragging my personal life through the court of public opinion. I don't want my parents' daily activities centered on a hospital visit. I don't want my husband to be stuck in limbo, struggling with his commitment to me, and the guilt of wanting to move on with his life. And I don't want to linger on, unable to interact with the world around me. Not if I can help it.
Listener-commentator Naomi Yaw lives in Lancaster with her husband and her dog, "Scout."